flotsam/jetsam

It’s been feeling a little video gamey around here lately, so I thought I should try and break up the monotony with a little trip to TV Land.  And so without further adieu, I give you the 8 Greatest TV Openings of All Time, in no particular order, as picked by me.

Knight Rider

Did anyone catch The Hoff on America’s Got Talent?  Turns out he’s legally retarded.  How in the fuck did we not see that one coming?

Sesame Street

Despite the 8 million Sesame Street videos on youtube, apparently the only opening they had in English was the vintage 1969 one.  All the rest were in freaky European languages you’ve never heard of – like Swedish, and Dutch.  Don’t believe me?  See for yourself.

The Brady Bunch

Ever since I learned that Robert Reed died of AIDS, I’ve been calling it “a case of the Mike Brady’s.”  It may seem mean, but hey – that’s what you get for fucking around on Florence Henderson in bus station bathrooms.

Transformers

Giant. Fucking. Robots.  If you need to question why this is on the list, I hope your car turns into a gun-toting goliath of steel and glass and crushes your meaty little body during the transformation.

The A-Team

If I was a Vietnam vet on the run for a crime I didn’t commit, I’d go to Mexico and bang hookers like Willem Dafoe in Born on the Fourth.

The Flintstones

I don’t know who decided that turning a show about beating your wife into a stone age cartoon was a good idea, but if I ever find out I’m going to give that man a hug.

The Muppet Show

Seriously – what the fuck was Gonzo?

Doctor Who

“And the award for TV Opening Most Likely to induce Seizures goes to….”  Listen – it may be a trippy mess, but the opening to Doctor Who has one of the most memorable TV theme songs EVER.  I was lucky enough to stumble across this video on youtube that ties every Doctor Who opening, from first to last, together in one clip.  Enjoy!

Disagree with the list?  Let me know what you think.